10 Random Poker Quotes

• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Poker is for loners.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• You have to piss with the dick you have