10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow