10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.