10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.