10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.