10 Random Poker Quotes

• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.