10 Random Poker Quotes

• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.