10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"