10 Random Poker Quotes

• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]