10 Random Poker Quotes

• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com