10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• It's Free To Fold...
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.