10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• im going to 2 out you to death
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.