10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.