10 Random Poker Quotes

• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.