10 Random Poker Quotes

• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.