10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.