10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo