10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "No river, no fish."
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Darwin takes a toll on the worst poker players because they lose money, Darwin takes a toll on average poker players because they don't make money and they will never be a great poker players, Darwin takes the greatest toll though, on the greatest poker players, because they could be doing something greater.