10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders