10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.