10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"