10 Random Poker Quotes

• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.