10 Random Poker Quotes

• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)