10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.