10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.