10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Its better to have played and lost then to not have played at all Dick McWatters