10 Random Poker Quotes

• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.