10 Random Poker Quotes

• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes