10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like life, most people don't learn from their mistakes they only recognize them. C.Arel
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."