10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.