10 Random Poker Quotes

• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.