10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Welcome to kicker school
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT