10 Random Poker Quotes

• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.