10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"