10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)