10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.