10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)