10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"