10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.