10 Random Poker Quotes

• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth