10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez