10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.