10 Random Poker Quotes

• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.