10 Random Poker Quotes

• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester