10 Random Poker Quotes

• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986