10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim