10 Random Poker Quotes

• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.