10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio