10 Random Poker Quotes

• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.