10 Random Poker Quotes

• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss